My life

2012-01-15T02:24:00.002+08:00

Reflection and self-actualisation is the greatest form of happiness in life.

People who have a meaning in their life live longer.

Well these were the two quotes that I got from the variety show that SNSD hosted. Watching the show, tears fall.

Sometimes, I wonder if my scars were healed. Watching the show, I realise, they aren't. I haven't learned to forgive and forget anything at all. Is this why it is bothering me?

I always thought that people will learn to cope with whatever they have encountered as time passes. Afterall, isn't that what the phrase says? Time heals all wounds?

Well, that doesn't seem to be the case. The boys are around 18 years old. Which is around J1? I thought only kids needed therapy because they couldn't walk out of their past themselves. It turned out not to be true.

Family, is indeed, the most crucial factor in anyone's life. It shapes the person to be who you are and what your believes are.

Is our personality in born or due to the environment? Is everyone born good?

Watching the show, my heart ached. Seeing how they struggle to find their way in life, I can't help but wonder, what's mine?

Suddenly, Seohyun really feels like a worthy role model. But is she really?

I don't know. Was so overwhelmed with emotions just now, yet, as I am about to pen these down, the thoughts no longer circle around my head.

I'll sleep on it and perhaps, be able to think clearer the next time I blog.

Goodnight world.

2012-01-12T00:57:00.003+08:00

Read about how stupid I was in the past. Read about what I felt in the past.

Reading past blog posts makes you see yourself in a new light. Suddenly, understanding, how, I am, nothing else, but just, like any other girl on the street.

A girl that can be really naive and stupid.

Have been thinking quite a bit recently though, realising, how little faith I have in relationships and guys.

If it wasn't that I am afraid to die alone and lonely, I would really not give a shit about relationships.

Well,

fuck that.

2012-01-12T00:41:00.002+08:00

Half a year since I last posted.

Happy 2012!

In the last 6 months, so many things happened. My exchange, in particular. And of course, not to forget, my trip with <3 to Taiwan.

This trip to Korea made me realise a lot of things. And for one, I learned how independent I can be. In Korea, I was allowed to be who I want to be, do what I want to do. No obligations, no nothing.

And that is the way I want it to be.

2011-07-30T23:52:00.002+08:00

I am like turning skeptical whenever I see people praying for something. Then again, I pray too. But sometimes, I wonder, why humans pray.

The question of God and everything still baffles me.

What happens when we die? Why is there life?

Truthfully speaking, if the Earth dies, and so do all other living things on earth, so what?

Ultimately, we are still this tiny speck in the whole galaxy.

And if there isn't an afterlife, what is the point in life, the world moves on.

And if there is an afterlife, are we living what we are now, for the afterlife?

One day..

2011-07-26T01:17:00.003+08:00

I wonder if I will remember how much I yearn for the simplicity in life 10 years down the road.

Watching My Fair Princess again, I am reminded of the simplicity of life and why it appeals to the audience so much.

It portrays the exact image and actions people do not have the courage to do.

敢爱敢恨

They were all people who dared to love, to fight for what they believe in, to bear consequences for their actions, always standing behind one another, doing crazy things together.

Even it meant to face death, they knew what they wanted, what they had to fight for.

Perhaps it is because it is exactly what we wished we were, that is why the audience loved the series so much.

The different types of love, all equally endearing and memorable.

The all accepting love, loving the person for who she is and loving him despite his many wrongdoings.

The all in love, putting everything into it, loving the other more than you love yourself.

The wasn't meant to be love, between people who shouldn't love, between people who shouldn't be together. And most importantly, how love, sort out their hatred, their grievances and others. And how love makes their lives better.

And how, being at the top, doesn't mean you can do what you want. Life isn't really a bed of roses at the top. You have your restrictions, Xia Yu He, people you cannot love, people you cannot be with.

Yong Qi & Xiao Yan Zi, Zi Wei & Er Kang, Qing'er & Xiao Jian. Even Xiang Fei and her prince.

I should watch the show again, in 3 years, to remind myself, of what life should be like. Not what others think is right, but what you think is right.

I love how dramas are subtle yet strong in their message. And as if the audience realise what they are fed with.

2011-07-12T21:30:00.003+08:00

It has been a long time since I've last posted.

I told myself, if I were to run for it, I will try my best. Yet, I didn't. I allowed time to consume me, to overwhelm me. I should have known better.

A year has passed, well, almost. And I have nothing but regrets. Perhaps this is an experience to tell me, that I am not suited to lead. I'm somewhere awkward in the middle. I'll never settle for second and yet, never good enough for first.

I should learn to adjust my ego, to bow down to others.

It is a regret, a regret so painful, I fear facing it again. I don't want to run away from training when I come back, yet, I don't think I have the courage to return.

Perhaps life would be better without Taekwondo. My passion, will it just end like that?

I really love Taekwondo, although I hardly said it out loud because I feel that I'm not fit to.

Why can't the club be somewhere to exercise, to train for fun? Why must we always aim for excellence and perfection? Why can't it just be recreational?

Why can't I find a club I can fit in?

2011-04-16T12:21:00.000+08:00

Ironically, after posted on the first week of school, things pretty much didn't go on as smoothly as I would have liked. Then again, life is still good because I guess, they aren't exactly huge issues or anything. Now that I've moved on to reading week, I realise how much time flies and I have been pretty much wasting my time away throughout the whole semester.

Moving to Korea soon. But before that, let's hope that the internship would turn out well. I am kinda scared actually.

2011-01-16T18:46:00.000+08:00

Been a long time since I last blogged. Life's good. Results were better than expected although I deproved a little. Technically there is no such work as deproved but whatever. Like i really care.

Sort of confirmed that I will be going Korea for exchange. Kinda excited about it. As much as people joke about me going there to chase stars, I am pretty sure I won't. Haha.

School is starting. Actually it has already started but whatever. I am pretty good the first week, attending all the lectures and diligently copying notes for everything. Pats myself on my back. Hope I will be able to keep it up.

I wonder why I don't use the blog as often as I used to do. Perhaps because I am no longer as emotional. Perhaps I have grown up? I certainly hope so. Haha.

Anyway, my emotions aren't as unstable as before I guess. And I am leading a pretty good life with friends and family around me. Don't really have much to complain about.

2010 had been a good year. I hope 2011 will be too. :)

2010-11-26T00:32:00.001+08:00

Disappointed

I am really very disappointed in myself.

I screwed up yesterday.

Yea. I'm not the kind to grumble over little things that I screw up in an exam.

But I am so deeply affected this time because I really think my head kinda got really big.

So what if it was a physics subject. Especially since it was a physics module I should do well.

So freaking easy and yet I cannot do.

I have no one else to blame but myself.

I know I should have slept early.

I know I can't function if I do not have enough sleep.

So why did I stay up late?

I can't believe I am letting myself off like that.

All the more I am going SEP next year, I need to get some money from somewhere. But a scholarship seem so faraway now.

All I can do is to teach more tuition.

Korea.

I should have known better.

2010-10-27T00:24:00.002+08:00

I know there are things bothering you. And you aren't as happy as you seem you are. But I never seem to be able to get any closer to your heart.

As I grow up, I take things more lightly. I no longer harp on things that were never meant to be. Perhaps, with you, it was never meant to be too. For 2 years, it happened. Regardless of whatever reasons you had, you've hurt me. As much as I didn't want to bother, its hard to ignore. Then again, I am not exactly angry anymore. I just don't really care.

Friends, what exactly are they? Time and time again, I have been proven that its not the amount of time you spend with each other, its just how much you can connect with the person.

I'm sorry if I haven't been keeping in touch with you. Seriously, I miss you. I miss the days we used to have, the days we used to talk on the phone all night, talking about everything under the sun.

I know we have drifted apart. Yet, a little string still hangs by. I wish I have the courage and determination to pull you back with it, before it breaks.

Then again, best friends are hard to find. I'm contented with the regular friends I have.

Growing up. Its part and parcel of life isn't it? Perhaps to grow up is to understand that there are things that will never be, that you can't force things to work out.

Somehow, I feel older. Not exactly more matured. I've came to understand that a lifelong friend is hard to find, and there isn't a point in forcing someone to fill that spot. Keeping it for someone special is more important than putting someone not suited.

I'm contented with the ways things are now. Friends around me, maybe not the people who understands me the most, maybe not the people who will stay by me always. But at least, I know they are here for me now.

Thinking back, I have so many different group of friends. Different people who mean different things to me.

I feel for every single one of them. Yet, I am tired, tired of having to spend time to stay in touch. I know that if they meant anything to me, I should put in the effort. But I am tired, really tired.

I miss you guys. What happened to the days where we would meet up all the time, talking rubbish, spending hours together, feeling like time flies and it wouldn't be long till we meet again?

2010-09-22T01:02:00.001+08:00

Not in the mood today. No idea why, but i have no wish to interact with you.

Perhaps, I realise, it is all a lie, there wasn't foundation to build on afterall.

How I will survive this, I do not know.

Perhaps a year later, I will look back and laugh at my stupidity.

2010-09-10T02:51:00.000+08:00

Haven't blogged in a while but I suddenly feel this strong urge to blog.

Perhaps things aren't the same.

Perhaps of the status and everything.

I don't see a very happy working together time ahead.

Am I ready for this?

I don't know.

This may just be the tip of a ice berg about to collapse.

I hope not but I'll try my best, and see what I can do.

2010-08-13T13:11:00.002+08:00

Too many things happening in my life now. But I got to say, that 10 mins after the Rag performance made everything worth it. I wanted to cry, thought it was silly, saw everyone crying, couldn't help but allow tears to roll down my cheeks.

Never had so much fun with my friends before. We are really meeting up a lot. And our clique is really big! But somehow, that got some tongues wagging. Oh well. Guess there are some things that will be inevitable in life.

War on saturday. Truthfully, I am worried about how things will turn out. Will see what happens then.

Lost my ability to write.

I'm sad.

2010-08-03T01:09:00.002+08:00

I wish all these would just end. Too many unhappy incidents, too many worries and frustrations. It has lost its meaning in the end. Its on longer what it started out to be. Everything seems never ending. No sense of urgency, no fun joy and laughter in anything at all. Sometimes I really wonder what and who I am doing all these for. All I really wanna do is to slip away slowly.

2010-07-17T21:33:00.002+08:00

School hasn't started. Actually I am spending more time in school now than during school term. So many things to do. Matric fair is coming. O week is this monday. Haven't done the things for matric fair. A bit worried about rag. Really hope we can get everything done by rag day because we have an amazing creative team. Random rants. I am actually looking forward to school starting because this means I am more free.

2010-07-10T22:15:00.002+08:00

Got this cute little thing. Not the best but it will suffice. :)

And I really love my 旺仔小馒头. They are the bestest best!

So sweet of them to go back to sch for me!! Love them to bit bit!

Wondering if I should go watch world cup finals with Zhiying and Ruiping. Chalet with 旺仔小馒头 or world cup with them?

Hmmm

Thy shalt see tomorrow.

2010-07-10T00:53:00.002+08:00

After 1 year, I finally left.

Wasn't particularly sad because I guess it was a decision made in the spur of a moment, not one made after careful considerations.

I guess I will miss the place.

I kinda like the job actually.

But I don't enjoy working there because I don't feel the team spirit.
Sometimes, people have PMS and it makes everything kinda bad.

I will miss saying all the standard lines, complaining about things, and everything.

Afterall, it has been more than 1 year. The longest job I have ever held.

And comparing tuition, call center and CO, I really think I enjoy working at CO the most.

Perhaps, one day, I will go back there.
A very very big perhaps.

Time to move on.

2010-06-23T01:30:00.002+08:00

With 2 more days to the camp, nothing gets more exciting than this.

Yet, a question plagues me.

How do I want to continue my life in uni?
Do I really want to abandon all events like what I have been saying?

Afterall, living for so long with so many events, will I get used to a mundane and monotonous life?

Then again, if I don't get used to this, when will I? Afterall, year 3 is no time to start all new and refreshed.

I have no idea what I want. Maybe I will just go with the flow.

And time flies past just like this.

2010-06-20T00:46:00.002+08:00

I don't know what is worse. Going for a S*F dinner when i am from G*M or sitting amongst a group of people I don't talk to.

Anyway, irony about being indifferent.

Are we indifferent because we really don't care or is it because we feel that it is out of our control, our reach?

Do we not care who topped the test because we really don't want to know, or is it because we know we aren't even close?

Do we really not care how things are run in a organisation, or is it because we undermine our abilities to make a difference?

Do we really not care about what is happening around us, or is it because we are too lazy to make the first move for a change?

2010-06-17T23:40:00.002+08:00

Was in a horrible horrible mood today. I haven't felt so horrible in a long time.

I hate having so many things to settle in school, coming home to have my grandma nag at me in the morning and afternoon, and having my parents nag when they come home.

I mean like, is it really that difficult to have a moment of peace and quiet anywhere?

I didn't mean to. I am just not in the mood to speak to anyone at this moment.
Perhaps this is just a phase that I will go through.

And friends. Will they walk this journey with you?

2010-05-18T23:08:00.002+08:00

TeamNUS summit.

Day 1:

Signing in at the MPSH, I was not surprised, although I won't deny that I was disappointed, that I wasn't in the same group as Jessica. Not even on the same coach.

Sitting around, waiting for everything to get started, the feeling of dread just got stronger.
Played some ice breakers, was kinda fun. Got to know some new people although I don't remember them now.

Then, it was time to sit down for a lecture on the Habits.

Blah blah blah.

After that long lecture, it was time for us to gather in our habits.

Played some random games. Couldn't really remember anyone's name actually. Other than Elaine and Si Xian because they sat beside me.

Alright, the truth is, I am not sure if I know everyone in my Habit even now after the whole camp is over.

Back to the topic, gathered and sort of prepared for us to leave the school.

The bus journey was horrible. I couldn't find a nice position to sleep. In the end, I didn't get much sleep.

Had a pit stop on the way and pretty much felt out of place again because Jessica found a group mate while I still pretty much lingered around aimlessly.

After a long journey, we've finally reached the first camp site.

And that marks DAY 2 of the camp.

2010-05-17T22:26:00.002+08:00

teamNUS summit.

Pre-camp:

I was really worried about going for the camp! I am not like some super super endurance kinda person. Going for a camp with all the sporty teamNUS people sounded super scary.
But still, I decided to give it a try, hoping that I will survive and time will pass quickly.

Reaching MPSH, all I can say is that I felt out of place. I knew no one there, Jessica hasn't reached and everyone seems to be in cliques.

Sitting at one corner, I so wanted to turn around and leave.

I remember still feeling all awkward and everything, lingering around. It felt just like how a red bean will feel amidst a pool of green beans. Although both beans, it just don't fit.

Then, it was time to go in the MPSH.

-Till camp starts.

2010-05-13T18:27:00.001+08:00

Off to malaysia in 1 hour's time!
First time stepping out of the country without my parents, the third time stepping out of the country actually.

Hope things will go fine.

Wish me luck. ^^

Bon Voyage to Hk and Sher too! Take care!=D

We shall meet on 30th ! =D

2010-05-04T01:09:00.002+08:00

Its been a long time since I last posted.
I realise my life has been pretty much at a standstill point.
Isn't this the life I've always wanted? To live simply, without worries?

I recall the days where each day, I sink deeper and deeper. I dare not look into the past. It feels as if it is a part of me that is hidden somewhere deep inside, somewhere, I dare not explore.

I know it is there. Every single day, I battle myself to walk through it.

Sometimes, time do not heal. Time just makes it easier to ignore.

I shall go off to bed. Perhaps, it is time I brought my own life under my own call.
Will this be a new beginning?

2010-04-19T02:27:00.000+08:00

[[ prince charming. ]]

If you know mandarin, you would know that price charming is also known as 白马王子.

This just further emphasize that your prince charming does not exist. Your prince won't come to you in a white horse like in fairytales.

Happily ever after is not something that just comes along because there aren't princesses around. Happiness comes with a price, happiness is something we have to work for.

Yet, the most fundamental requirement is to be given the chance to work for it. Will everyone get the chance to?

*Katty
(( happiness ))

2010-04-18T21:46:00.003+08:00

[[ darnest ]]

And they say kids say the darnest thing. I think people who are adults and can't think say the darnest thing.

The difference? It sounds cute when the kid says it. It sounds ridiculous and stupid from an adult. Even if the person is just a young adult.

*Katty
(( heh ))

2010-04-16T00:18:00.000+08:00

[[ drama vs reality? ]]

The only difference between dramas and reality is not the people or characters in it. It is the events. There are kind people worthy of happiness everywhere. Yet, not all seem to find their other one. Why?

Because in dramas, the other person will always somehow find out about the main lead's kindness and inner self, something normal personalities will not do in their daily lives.

*Katty
(( Bleh ))

2010-04-13T04:20:00.000+08:00

[[ weird ]]

I just think some people are like weird? They ask for help but reject the suggestions given by others.

*Katty
(( clueless ))

2010-04-11T22:24:00.002+08:00

[[ television ads ]]

It is funny how they screen tv ads on how amazing the new series of TV is, like how clear the pictures are and how define the colours are.

I mean, if i can see how brilliant your colours and clear the pictures are, it just means that i have a good TV already. Why should i buy a new one?

*Katty
(( TV? ))

2010-04-09T23:34:00.002+08:00

[[ small talk ]]

If there is one thing I must admit is that I really cannot endure small talks, and neither do I have the talent to maintain small talks. Its either I talk to you really heartily or nothing.

Which isn't very good because sometimes, small talks are crucial in social settings.

Gosh. Spare me the torture.

*Katty
(( Small talks ))

2010-04-08T23:04:00.001+08:00

[[ toilet ]]

It is funny how women always complain about man wetting the toilet seat at home.
Yet when you are outside, in the female toilet, the toilet seat is always wet from the previous user.

*Katty
(( Oh well ))

2010-04-06T19:04:00.000+08:00

[[ Shoes ]]

Ever wondered why women always need more shoes?
I never understood why until now.

I am beginning to feel the pressure of needing more shoes!!
I never seem to find the perfect shoe to match my outfit.

Tsk. I am growing to become a stereotype.

*Katty
(( OMFG ))

2010-04-05T19:19:00.002+08:00

[[ old ]]

I realise as we grow older, we change. Not in the same sense as in the line "you've changed" you hear in relationships, but more like unknowingly, you start to treat people differently, speak to people differently and behave differently in front of others.

I've never really taken note of how I look in front of others before, perhaps that is why I wear the most outrageous things out last time. Not to say I look good now but at least I try to take note of how I am presented in front of others more often than before.

Have you ever noticed the day you suddenly forget all the childhood fantasies you have? For one, I used to swear of cars, thinking they are bad for the environment and everything. Then, as I grow older, I realise how much I wish I have a car sometimes.

Suddenly, all the things we felt absurd when we were younger don't seem so ridiculous after all. Just like how I always wondered as a child, why is it so difficult for adults to be happy with what they have. I have always wondered why is there a need to gamble, to buy 4D and stocks and everything. I have always wondered why adults seem to forget there is no free lunch in this world and we should work for what we want and not wait for it to fall from the sky.

Then again, slowly, I realise I have been doing that too. Not the gambling part but more like I don't exactly work very hard. Yet, I expect my grades to fall from the sky. I get disappointed with lousy grades although I know I deserve it. I compare myself to people who are luckier than me, knowing perfectly well that there are more people who ended up worse off. I mean, not that my life is great but it is definitely far from being down under at the moment. *God bless I hope it stays that way*

Which is why I guess, as we grow older, the harder it is for us to remember the simplicity in happiness. Children actually know more than us. In the sense that they look at things just the way it is. Perhaps many would think that they haven't seen enough of the world. Yet, perhaps it isn't that bad to live in their world i guess.

One common thought most of us would have thought of at least once in our live time would be that "I wish I didn't grow up so fast" or "I wish to return back to my childhood days". Indeed, life was simpler when we were a child.

Yet, young kids will always want to grow older. None of the kids would believe it when adults say that they will one day wish they would return to the time when they were kids.

Its an ironic cycle isn't it?

Perhaps, when one day adults learn how to properly communicate and raise their kids, the cycle would stop.

Alright, I don't think anyone understands what I am trying to say.

But that is alright, I just wanna pen my thoughts.

It has been a long while since I've done that.

I miss the feeling. Perhaps I will be back to blogging again. =D

*Katty

2010-04-05T18:03:00.002+08:00

[[ Dreams ]]

So many dreams, so much determination. But when the time really comes, nothing is accomplished. Sounds familiar? I am sure it isn't foreign to many of us.

Sometimes, I wonder why there is a need for dreams. Afterall, how many of our dreams have we reached?

Then again, without dreams, life wouldn't hold much meaning would it?

*Katty
(( Ponders ))

2010-04-04T15:12:00.000+08:00

[[ Sleep ]]

I should seriously stop sleeping.
I slept through my whole holidays!!

Technically, its not even a holiday.
I am supposed to be mugging.

This is bad.
Real bad.

*Katty
(( ops ))

2010-04-04T01:37:00.001+08:00

[[ Ani-animation ]]

I am like damn fascinated by photoshop being able to do animation! Like AWESOME!! Too bad there seem to be a file limit. I tried doing this animation that is damn nice but apparently the file size is too large so photoshop crashed before i can save it. =(

Exams are coming. I need to start mugging. Like soon. =(

Life is a bitch. That's sad.

*Katty
(( blink blink ))

2010-04-02T18:45:00.002+08:00

[[ No longer hateful ]]

I have to admit that you don't seem that irritating recently. Maybe perhaps that awkwardness whenever we go out is no longer there.

Not that I am holding a torch for you. It is more like I no longer resist the idea of holding a torch for you. Wonders if that makes sense.

*Katty
(( candles ))

2010-03-27T20:51:00.000+08:00

[[ Outsider ]]

I feel like I am slowly losing touch. Just as if I am an outsider. Perhaps I am. Perhaps I am.

*Katty

2010-03-16T00:25:00.001+08:00

[[ Dreams ]]

Dreams are always crushing when they don’t come true. But it’s the simple dreams that are often the most painful because they seem so personal, so reasonable, and so attainable. You’re always close enough to touch, but never close enough to hold and it’s enough to break your heart.

*Katty
(( Dreams ))

2010-02-28T23:19:00.002+08:00

[[ Piling underneath ]]

I think I am going to die under the tremendous workload. I have so many things coming up in the coming month I think I will not be able to do anything right!

I have Econs Test this friday, IVP on friday, Sat and Sunday, Section meeting on Sunday.
I have open house the following week, which will take up damn lots of time because that is my pet event under taekwondo.
After that I have GEM test....
The week after, I have to go help out for NUSWS concert.
And in between all these, I have taekwondo, work, school and still have to design the FOC website.

And that is nt but I am just too lazy to type out everything.
Better go back to studying ECONS. SIAN

*Katty
(( RAHH ))

2010-02-04T21:59:00.001+08:00

[[ and to think... ]]

To think I thought I can have 1000 posts by last year. HAHA.. now only 800 plus plus plus..

I am so dead for this sem. =( Modules are like freaking difficult! HAIES

CNY dinner tomorrow. *cross fingers* for good response!!!
Self defence course on sat.. Kinda gave up on the response. out of 25 ppl.. 4 are like I jio one.. like 1/6? And I hope i can practice with them...

Rag is kinda kick started today.. FOC will need to decide on the theme soon.. IVP is next month.. Open house is next month.. Sports bazaar like I don't-know-when...

Vday will be done next wed..

Full of commitments. =(

What happened to the part last sem about the swearing off commitments?

But I have to admit, although it is really tiring planning all these things, at least I am doing something I like.
I wonder if i will get used to a quiet life next acad year.. Hmmm..

*Katty
(( BLEH ))

2010-02-01T19:55:00.002+08:00

[[ Dead ]]

Physics test on friday! I highly suspect it is not MCQ. I am so dead!! OMG!

The assignment question is crazily hard!

Work today is alright but I had like 3 voids. Like seriously.
I realise a lot of cheapo customers come into the store and try to bargain their way when the things are already so outrageously cheap!
There was like this customer. She wanted to buy this promotion basic T which cost 2 for $20 and this other printed t-shirt for $10. In the end, her bf/husband/atm's card could not get through for what reason I really do not know because this is like the first day of the month and there is absolutely no reason for anyone to max their card.

In the end, because she had to use her own money to pay, she decided she did not want the 2 for 20 top and only pay for the printed T which resulted in 2 freaking voids!

And it wasn't like she had no money to pay. She gave me $50 to pay for her $10 top. She had the freaking money to pay but she didn't want to because she is using her own money, not her bf/husband/atm's money!

I was like totally roll eyes can!

Some women just don't have their own back bone.

*Katty
(( Roll eyes. ))

2010-01-31T18:02:00.002+08:00

[[ marley and me. ]]

It was an amazing concept that I was only, now, in the wake of his death, fully absorbing: Marley as mentor. As teacher and role model. Was ti possible for a dog--any dog, but especially a nutty wildly uncontrollable one like ours--to point humans to the things that really mattered in life? I believed it was. Loyalty. Courage. Devotion. Simplicity. Joy. And the things that did not matter, too. A dog has no use for fancy cars or big houses or designer clothes. Status symbols means nothing to him. A waterlogged stick will do just fine. A dog judges others not by their colour or creed or class but bu who they are inside. A dos does not care if you are rich or poor, educted or illiterate, clever or dull. Give him your heart and he will give you his. It was really quite simple and yet we humans, so much wiser and more sophisticated, have always had trouble figuring pout what really counts and what does not. As I wrote that farewell column to Marley, I realized it was all right there in front of us, if only we opened out eyes. Sometimes it took a dog with big bad breath, worse manners and pure intentions to help us see.

*Katty
(( Marley ))

2010-01-24T01:14:00.002+08:00

[[ complains ]]

Yeah yeah.. Someone is complaining that I haven't been blogging.
But seriously, there is nothing to blog about. =(

And truthfully, I am kind of sick of bash.
I do understand that the main committee did do a lot of things for the event and of course faced a lot of problems.
Me being sick of bash has nothing to do with anyone. Mainly just me, my very own problem.

I am sick of having so many things around me I guess. Considering I am the one who decided to join so many things, I pretty much only have myself to blame.

I am sick of work too. I no longer find the enthusiasm to go for work. I used to enjoy working. Now, I seem to be trying my very best to escape working. =(

The only thing I still seem to have some interest for at the moment is Taekwondo. Don't ask me why because it is not as if everyone there is the closest of all friends. We are okay with each other. But time seems to past rather quickly during trainings and after training activities.

I guess I am rather sorry to Hui Jin for giving her so many problems. But the thing is my parents really do not like me to go clubbing and staying out too late. Especially when I have morning classes the next day.
Friends should know that. I have always been the one at the rush to go home especially when it reaches like 10pm or so. Especially lamerstory gang. I am always the first one to say I have to leave, resulting in them having to cut short the outing. =(
I don't seem to be able to put across the message very clearly though.

And I realise I have this very big problem with myself. I can't seem to be able to reject people properly. I always try to agree when ever I can. When I have to reject someone, I usually feel so bad I will end up going back to the person so say that I can do it.

Its kinda dumb.

Haies.

I miss ashley. =(

*Katty
(( Bleh ))

2010-01-13T01:54:00.002+08:00

[[ Life is sad ]]

I think its PMS. Or at least I hope is PMS!

Feeling rather down recently. No mood to do anything.
Don't feel like talking to them.
Giving them the bare minimum reply.

I am sick and tired of being given hope only to be let down in the end.

Why prolong the pain when everything can end in just one shot.

I am sick and tired of everything. I just want things have a happy ending. Is that really too much to ask?

School sucks pretty much too.
I don't feel as if I belong.

I just don't.

Maybe I should just lie down and die away.

I want to paint my face, and pretend that I am someone else.

*Katty
(( Can't be bothered ))

2010-01-10T23:54:00.001+08:00

[[ swollen ]]

My eyes are swollen and tired from all the crying. And shoots. The mere mention of it makes me want to cry again.

Why is it so difficult to get a little bit of freedom from you?

Why is it so difficult for me to get what I want?

I am not happy.

But what can I do?

*Katty
(( 2010 sucks to the core ))

2010-01-09T23:26:00.001+08:00

[[ i realised]]

I realised I have no means of communicating with you at all. Makes me don't feel like talking to you at all.

How I wish you didn't make my life miserable.
Like seriously.

And why do I fucking cry so easily?
Just by typing that stupid 4 lines above, I am already tearing.

Like what the fuck is wrong with me?

You don't understand me. You never will.
Because you never listen.

You always think you are right.

I don't feel like talking to you ever.

But I know that can never work.

Because all it does, is make things worse.

*Katty
(( Lost and abandoned ))

2010-01-04T22:26:00.002+08:00

[[ I just want to cry ]]

I have no idea why they don't understand me.
Every single time we have to go through this again and again.
We don't come to any conclusions.

Every single time this happens, we just try to ignore it. Nothing gets resolved.

I want to paint my face
and pretend that I am someone else
Sometimes I get so fed up
I don't even wanna look at myself

But people have problems that are worse than mine
I don't want you to think I'm complaining all the time
And I hate the way you look at me I have to say
I wish I could start over

I am slowly falling apart
I wish you'd take a walk in my shoes for a start
And you might think its easy being me
You just stand still, look pretty

Sometimes I find myself shaking
in the middle of the night
And then it hits me and I can't
even believe this is my life

But people have problems that are worse than mine
I don't want you to think I'm complaining all the time
And I wish that everyone would go an shut their mouth
I'm not strong enough to deal with it

*Katty

2009-12-31T22:26:00.002+08:00

[[ End of 2009 ]]

I have no idea why everyone says 2009 is a bad year. Perhaps all the financial crisis and everything is wearing people out and most people cannot seem to wait till 2009 is over.

Well, I think 2009 is pretty much a good year for me. In fact, I can say it is the best year I've had in years. HAHA.

Perhaps it is because well, school started not too long ago and I seem to classify time with regards to when I start school.
Well, this year isn't perfect. I've faced hic-cups along the way which did upset me but on the whole, it went well.

I've met so many new people, made so many new friends. Met so many people I know will stay with me for many more years ahead.

Found my very first proper job for the first time. Working at the call center really allowed me to learn tons of things. Firstly, I learned some valuable lessons with regards to employment terms and conditions. Secondly, I learned the importance of interpersonal relations. I am pretty amazed at how outspoken I am. I never in my life imagined myself going against my manager and I did. I knew I was headstrong, but I never knew I was that headstrong. Perhaps stubborn would be a better word?

Working there also allowed me to know this group of amazing temps that made life so much better! Somehow, we don't seem to be able to meet up very often! I think we totally should some day. I miss you guys so much!

Not too long after, I found a new job at Cotton On which is also the current company I am working in. I am really happy I got in because I think in a way, it allowed me and nic to become less like an acquaintance and more like a friend, making big group outings with Shan, Sher and Hk no longer awkward. So in a way, I did gain something from working there.

Then school started.
I have to admit it took me quite long to adapt to school life. Like all those periods that you face being alone and everything. Although I am quite lucky to have like my first sem spent with my friends, like I don't really have times when I am alone.
I have to say that I must be really crazy to overload myself with so many things in sem 1. Resulting in me not attending any of the lectures proper. Especially STATS! Like seriously, I either sleep through STATS or facebook through the whole lecture. So I really must be thankful for being able to scrape through sem 1! No, I am not bragging about my results because they aren't fantastic anyway. I am just really surprised that I can pass my PF modules. Its like, I was so tired at some point of time in sem 1, I really thought I am going to die under all the tremendous workload and everything.

I know I shouldn't do that for sem 2 but somehow, it feels as if history is going to repeat itself. With different commitments of cause. I can see that sem 2 is going to be a difficult sem for all the taekwondo committee people with all the events coming up. I guess Eugene and Jess will have a harder time seeing how they need to liaise with the sports club and oversee everything. We have to work hard together! Plus, sem 2 means harder modules, especially with IT and everything.

But I am going to try hard to study hard for next sem. I hope to do better than this sem. :)

2009 is of cause not without its turn offs. Sometimes, in life, you lose friends with people you never thought you would and you become friends with people you never thought you would.

SZB i guess would be one of my biggest regrets this year. I really wanted to try and keep ourselves together but it doesn't seem to work. However, I do have to admit I did not keep up with the consistent effort. Nevertheless, I tried. Perhaps not the hardest I can but, it is kinda hard to be the only pushing force. I guess I'll have to settle for our status quo. Perhaps because we all have too much we don't know about each other making it so difficult to stay together. Perhaps we were never real friends to every other person in the group. We seem to stay together because of a link or another within the group.

I guess, maybe, things are better this way.

Then with the lamerstory gang. Its amazing how our friendship remains as strong huh.
With the exception of Sher and Shan, Ying2 is the longest friend I have. We may not tell each other every single thing. We may not spend a lot of time together and we may not know each other very very well and everything. But I do know that amongst all my friends, I am the most protective of her. I guess cause I sort of saw her grow up? I sound like some old hag! Wahahahaha. Its because she was playing seconds with me all along in RV. After a year of non-contact, she came into NJ. And we sort of bonded through all the band practice in NJ? Slowly, the 5 of us became closer due to certain reasons. Like *cough*Ze*cough*yi*cough*and*cough*chris*cough*liew. HAHA.
Well, I'm not complaining because I really do enjoy each and every second of the time spent with them. Some friends, as time pass, you know you won't last. With them, I know that with every second, I become more confident about our friendship being able to withstand the test of time.

Then with Shan, Sher and HK. I have no idea when exactly did it change from Shan and Sher to Shan, Sher and HK, but I am not complaining! I guess this year is the year I learnt a lot about our friendship. I used to resist, or at least try to resist, the bond that is forming between Sher and HK. I used to feel kind of left out and everything. Yet, I think it is because I've matured ( I think I have at least), that I understood that certain things have changed beyond my control and it is better to accept changes than resist it. In a way, we've sort of found an equilibrium amongst us I guess. I think comparing the difference between SZB and them is that amongst Shan, Sher, HK and me, we can all be friends and totally at ease with any one person in the group. Everyone is friends with everyone else. And I think MSN plays a very important role too!

I want to go one but I lost my train of thoughts.
Blog again next time I guess.

Happy new year people!

*Katty
(( LOVES ))

2009-12-23T00:47:00.003+08:00

[[ Surprising ]]

Results are out!
Like seriously, i thought there was a system glitch can! Ok, I did not do extremely well...
But i am contented because it is seriously unexpected. I really never imagined in my wildest dream i would actually get this grade.

No no, i did not do ultra well. But i am super contented.
I'm happy with myself! And I really hope I will not be that stupid to overload myself with as much things next sem.

I had jap lessons, tuition, work, taking 6 modules, taekwondo, band concert, taekwondo committee commitments and de club events in sem 1. I really felt like I was overloaded with things to do. At some point of time, I was so tired and worn out from the commitments, I felt like I never had enough sleep and felt like I was going to break down. I thought I wasn't going to survive!

And thus, because i said if i survive this sem, i will focus more next sem, I shall try my hardest to not play facebook in lecture next sem!

Jiayou!

I must not overload myself next sem! I am going to be staying in hall and Taekwondo has lots of events in sem 2! I am already in charge of 3! I hope first 4 weeks of sem flies past because bash, cny and ivp related things will confirm take up all my free time.

Talking about IVP, i better get the shirt design done soon and figure out how to video record my things! Need to find out if the format can be used in windows movie maker too! So that I can edit it.

And I realise how much I love both lamerstory and my RV gang. Because long and lasting friendships are so hard to come by.

*likes HK's latest post*

*Katty
((Loves ))

2009-12-08T21:54:00.002+08:00

[[ Retreat ]]

It is all fun and games after exams!

Like seriously, I didn't expect myself to enjoy the chalet. Ok, thats mean but I really mean it. Afterall, I don't really know many people in the club other than Liyun. However, being part of the committee, I have to turn up.

Like seriously? I have absolutely no idea why I ran for a position anyway.
I guess a large part of the boils down to me wanting to force myself to come for trainings.
Afterall, if I became a comm memeber, it wouldn't be right for me to not come for trainings right. And I know that I will definitely not go for trainings if I can because of like a million other reasons.

Anyway, no idea why I ranted so much anyway.

Anyways, enough of anyway and back to the topic.
Surprisingly, I had quite a lot of fun hanging around people and everything during the chalet.
Some of the comm members met up earlier to buy some things and set some things up at the chalet.
Then like fast forward, we had BBQ and like played some random games and everything.
Then we had night cycling!

It was really funny in the sense that Eugene checked out the route to esplanade from Sentosa without checking out how to get out of Sentosa! We took like a million minutes to get out of Sentosa. But the whole experience was really fun. Ok, note the lack of vocabulary here. Limited to fun, fun, fun, fun.
But it really is FUN. HAHAHAHAHA.

But in a way, got to know some people better through this chalet. Like I would have never spoken to Crystal, Jazreel, Ruiyan and WeiQin without this chalet. Same goes to the other comm members too.

Still, it is kinda sad that most of the seniors and coach didn't come. I really hope we have enough funds for another chalet perhaps after end of sem 2 to make up for this one. At least without IVP, we can arrange the chalet to be at any time of the holiday and hopefully more people will come. =D

Lots of pictures but too lazy to link them all up here.

Last words?

I had FUN. LOL!!!

*Katty
(( Limited ))

2009-12-03T23:52:00.002+08:00

[[ almost dead ]]

I am just this far from officially screwing my UNI life!
Exams are over for the moment and 20 more days till doomsday is here.

Damn screwed.
All my fault for skipping lectures, sleeping in lectures, playing facebook in lectures and not doing my tutorials.

I deserve whatever grade I get. I know that. But I really wanted to do well in UNI. Oh well. I always say I want to do well but end up playing and scraping my way through. I hope I can scrape my way through though. PRAYS REALLY HARD.

Back to work again.
Somehow I don't seem to be working a lot. Yet, when I look at my schedule, I am like working every other day. Hmmm..

I am still super broke.
I really want to stay in hall. But money woes again.
I hope I earn enough during this break so that i can pay half of the expenses myself.
But I will only be earning like 400 plus this month?
Broke broke broke!
=(

I want to devote more time to work. But I want to enjoy my holidays!
Haies.
Money woes sucks.

Actually I do have a lot on my mind. But somehow, I don't seem to find the right person to tell it all to.
I don't want to let others know about this but having this weigh me down, its tiring.

Enough of this emo shit.

Went out with Wenqi after exams. Ate sushi with Erl and Wenqi. Then Wenqi and I went to bugis to shop. Damn sad. I didn't buy anything. =(
Oh wells. Then went to pub with Eugene, Ying2 and Chrisliew. Midori is nice~

Crapped all the way till like 10 plus a bit?
I think we can really crap. Should change our name from lamerstory to crap gang. LOL

Then wednesday went picnic with them again! With Mildred coming along.
I really wish the day comes that all of us, including Mildred feels totally at ease with each other so that we can all hang out more often.
Cannot deny that things felt a little weird but then again, it is the first time she is joining us. It would be weird if the first outing was totally at ease. LOL.

Just hope that we can all hang out together more often so that Eugene won't feel sandwiched in the middle.

Oh well. Went to Chrisliew's house for a while before the movie.
Played photohunt! HAHA. While Zeyi went on with his imba piano playing.

Watched Christmas carols!
Its not cartoon can! Its a horror movie larh! Damn scary!!!

But watching with them is fun. HAHA.

And I really really hope that Ying2 can work at C.O! I wanna work with her!!! Then can see her more often seeing that she replies sms so slow, hard to jio her out.

Anyway, went to K box with Shan and HK today!
Sing until no voice can.
Somehow, feel like never sing enough. HAHA.

Oh well. And I suck at duets. Bleh! Heehee...
But the student's price thingy quite cheap leh! $14.50 for like 2 to 7 then like got side dish and finger food and drink. Quite shuangs! I wanna go there again!

But it boils down to spending money.
Rah.
Hostel?
Money?

Dilemma!

*Katty
(( sadded ))

2009-11-19T22:28:00.002+08:00

[[ Cutting off all connections ]]

I want to cut off all connections from you. Why don't you just let me do it? Can you just tell all your fucking friends to leave my life and my world alone?

You are a horrible horrible mistake I wished with all my might that I never committed. I want to move on from what mistake and forget everything that if even teeny weeny related to you.

I never EVER FUCKING said you cheated on me. So what are you so paranoid about?
And DO NOT talk to me no matter where you see me. Because I have no wish to even dirty my eyes by looking at you.

*Katty
(( moving on. ))

2009-11-07T22:03:00.001+08:00

[[ disappointed ]]

Alright. I know I shouldn't be complaining because I didn't do very badly but I really expected something more than this. I got only 21/30 for the second stats test. I studied so hard for it and yet I only scored like this. Compared to the previous test whereby I spent like 2 hours to study for it the day before?

This cannot be! I must do well for my finals for stats. I must mug hard for it no matter what!!
I think I will screw up for finals! OMg. No time to study! =(

I shall give myself one year to try pfm. If i really don't like it/cannot do well for it, I most prob will change to science or arts. Actually I prefer arts but I don't like writing essays and doing my readings. So most prob I will go science and major in physics? See how. Then at most become a teacher. Haha.. I think I think too far le. See how bah. But I shall give in my best for PFM as much as I can from now on.

*Katty
(( Rahhhh ))

2009-11-01T23:10:00.002+08:00

[[ Ohoh ]]

Finals are coming. I have no idea what to do. I have ES tomorrow but I have no idea what we are doing tomorrow.
Anyway, tag replies:

Yvonne: Omg. YOu better treasure ur life now you know!!!
Ziyan:Heehee. I think so too. I think now my number 8 should be I hope i can survive UNI!
Brandon: Yes. It is chui

I have no more SOCI tutorial anymore! Say bye bye to soci!! ^^
LOL!! Actually I enjoy soci tutorials a lot. I like soci lectures too. I just don't like not knowing what to write for the essay.

School is ending. I cannot believe 1 sem is over just like that. I think UNI life pass ten million times faster than JC or secondary.

Anyway, lamergang came over to my house ytd. The surprise they gave was super wonderful!! I heart them to bits can! I think its pretty amazing how far we've come. Afterall, is like, we started out as a section, not as friends. So it is pretty amazing how we can all still remain as a clique after band and still hang out so often!!

Lets go watch a movie together someday. We haven't done that before! Although I think it is a bit hard with the 2 guys being rather picky about what they want to watch.

I am also very lazy to blog pictures because the files are so huge when my internet connection is like snail speed.

I want to get back to the tempo of blogging but I think facebook has been absorbing my time away.

Time to get back on track. Books, here I come!

*Katty
(( XOXO ))

2009-10-18T22:20:00.002+08:00

[[ Busy school life ]]

I have never been so busy in my whole life before!
For the first time, I do not have concrete homework to do considering I only have stats tutorial. Yet, I am struggling so much with all the things piled up on my to-do list.

Somehow though, I always find enough time to play Facebook games. I should seriously stop playing all these. Haies. I am mugging with Amy tomorrow afterschool though.

I need to learn how to survive in UNI. Seriously, what happened to my determination to get a second major?

I am dying under the workload. Band, taekwondo, work, school projects. This is considered better already since like previously I still had tuition and jap lessons.

My birthday is coming. Highly doubt if I will get any surprise. Haies...........

Uni life is seriously disgusting. =(

*Katty
((rah))

2009-10-12T09:20:00.003+08:00

[[ boring school ]]

Haven't been blogging much recently. And I realise my blog post recently all starts with that sentence. Oh well...

Lessons are a bore and i am like being overloaded with too many things to do. And I am waiting for official announcement of something that i am worried about. Please wish me luck!!

I can't seem to pay attention in class. I wonder how people can actually pay so much attention in class and copy notes.
I realise I didn't use to be so unattentive in class. I remember being quite ok in JC. I wonder why... Especially since I start school earlier in Jc.

Band concert in 2 weeks. I haven't checked how many tickets I've sold actually.
I think around 8?
I wonder if there is band next monday. Since they've mentioned that they would like to increase the number of band pracs.

Stats is real boring. Teaching hypo testing now. I think the NJ lecturer teaches better. Maybe because I'm not listening. Hahaha!!

I wann graduate and waste my life away. =(

*Katty
(( rahhh ))

2009-10-04T00:52:00.001+08:00

[[ Time flies ]]

I seriously think that life in uni flies like nobody's business!
We are like now 6 weeks from recess week again? Like in another 6 weeks, it will be time to mug for exams and finals will be there.
I seriously think I am going to screw up my studies in UNI. I am so gonna die! And to think I was stupidly ambitious about getting a second major. My goodness. How could I have been so ambitious.

And HALLOWEEN celebrations is on my birthday. Oh man. I don't know if I should go. I want to join in the fun for the halloween but I want to celebrate my birthday with my parents and friends also! It seems a bit weird to ask Eugene or even Sher Shan HK to come for SDE's halloween. But I want to be one of the people scaring others in the haunted trail! =(

And I need to start studying soon. LIKE SERIOUSLY! I am so lagging behind in everything! I need to start revising like crazy can! =(

And I think I am fa-hua-chi-ing. Oh wells. Heehee..

What does life bring for me?

*Katty
(( Missing you ))

2009-09-27T21:19:00.002+08:00

[[ I am angry]]

I am pissed. I really am. What the fuck can? You do NOT have the right to get angry at anything. You are trying to be protective of your FUCKING mother. SO AM I.
I am pissed.

I know I will get my karma. But I really wish that you don't exist so that all the troubles will go away with you too.
FUCK.

*Katty
(( DAMN PISSED ))

2009-09-24T00:13:00.002+08:00

[[ Life ]]

It is always easier to make friends than keep friends.
How many times did we promise ourselves and each other that we will never drift apart but eventually will?

Yet, no one is to blame. It is difficult to be the one trying all the time. Yet, if no one takes the first step, nothing gets done.

I am pretty amazed that Shan, Sher and I can be friends for so long! Like 7 years and counting. And we are still meeting up! We might not talk all day, we might not go out all the time but we still meet up pretty often and all.

I think I might stop blogging all together sooner or later. I haven't been blogging because I guess recently, there hasn't been much to blog about anyway.

Band is pretty much tiring and everything. Still on the process of getting to know the people in my section. And I have lots to learn about the university style of doing things.

I love taekwondo pretty much. But I am uncertain about whether to do conversion. I will feel guilty about abandoning my previous club to join the new one. Yet, I do want to try and take part in competition and all those. The people in Taekwondo are really nice! Especially the new people I've met like Gienah and Li Yun. I look forward to taekwondo every week actually. =D

And Eugene's blog post made me miss him so much! Its been a long time since I last HTHT with him!
And Ying2 has been pretty much on my mind recently.
I wanna meet up with lamergang soon!

*Katty
(( ?? ))

2009-09-16T08:25:00.002+08:00

[[ Stats ]]

I'm at stats now! I think I shall do self study. Anyway, I have 6 hours break later on without anything to do! =(

I hope someone I know will be rotting around in school too. Bleh. Or else I think I would most probably go home to sleep and come back. Siannnnn....

Anyway, I've just wasted my days away although I cannot deny that I did have a good time. Like DUH, who wouldn't enjoy going out?! HAHA.

Went out with Brandon, Yingzi and Bradley yesterday.
Met up with Bradley first to go JP together. The trip to JP was super hilarious. Cannot remember what we talked about. All I remember is Bradley saying how he needs to match my "low/childish frequency". Like what the hell. He is like younger than me can!

Anyway, we went to eat at some gourmet buffet thing. I think I like the lunch better but the tea session thing is so much cheaper! OH well.

Random chit chat until like 5? Somehow time passed like super quickly. Oh ya. I bought cake for Brandon. Like I design de leh! Haha. Not very nice though.

Anyway, after the buffet, went to watch Gamer. OMG. Damn gross! Like ewwwwwwww.. A lot of nudity can. I was like covering my eyes half of the time. 1/4 because of the nudity. 1/4 due to the gross bloody scenes. Waste money. This reminds me. I haven't paid Brandon the ticket money. Ops.

After the movie, we went home. We've already left JP when I realised we left the cake with the cinema because the staff there said that we cannot bring food into the cinema so they took it for safe keeping. In the end, I went back to take the cake. All because Brandon insist that they will keep the cake till next week. So he planned on going back next week to get the cake. Oh well. I think going back there just to get the cake is dumb anyway. So I went back to collect the cake.

And that ends my day...
Slack life hor? I think I better treasure this period whereby I still have time to meet up with people around me. I will soon lose this luxury. =(

*Katty
(( SLACKER ))

2009-09-14T23:42:00.002+08:00

[[ Bowling ]]

Woohoo!! Went bowling and pool today! Fun Fun FUn!!
And I am still thinking if i should drop one CCA. I really think I won't be able to cope. And I will feel super guilty about not going for taekwondo on wednesdays when I have sectionals on wednesdays. I really love love band. But I love taekwondo too. =(

I shall think about that when the time comes bah. I seriously had no idea why I ran for a position. All I wanted was to be an assistant so I can be like active in some CCA. I never expected to be the head. Feels kinda stressed since I've never done this before!

Anyway, enough talk about this.

Went bowling! And I am like super super noob in the second round. But I managed to strike K!! AND IT WAS NOT TYCO, much to the common belief.
I have skill can. Second round is just because I am too tired.
And I keep laughing at Brandon's gutters. Heehee.. Karma for him laughing at mine too. =p
Huikiow is pro de larh! She like top score for both rounds can!!!

Bleh. Pool was even more funny! Initially we played the normal kind of pool and I learnt a few things about it! Then we played some survival game. Super fun can! We keep trying to kill people! Whahaha.. In the end, the first round, I didn't even realise I died. Then I keep forgetting my number and keep trying to kill myself! Luckily my aiming not very accurate. HAHAHA!!

Then towards the end, we just went crazy! With me trying to throw the balls up to the table and them pushing the balls down the hole, it was a never ending cycle can!

But it was all fun and laughter. =D

*Katty
(( Bleh ))

2009-09-10T13:04:00.001+08:00

[[ Sociology ]]

Wahahaha!! I am like playing mahjong in sociology!! Wahahah.. Ops.. And some seniors I know happen to be sitting behind me. I totally did not know!
Like omg!

Bleh. But mahjong is seriously very fun and addictive! Ops. Blame the person who introduced me the game! Wahhahaha..

Aiya. This lecture has webcast anyway.. So it should not affect me too much right... I hope.. I am seriously lagging behind in school work but I don't seem to find the motivation to start studying like I should.

I vow to start soon. How soon is soon? Hmmm.. Pretty soon.. I hope.. HAHA..

School's just started. I do have a little reason to not listen right? *draws circle*

Heehee...

*Katty
(( lessons? ))

2009-09-09T22:38:00.003+08:00

[[ Woooooo ]]

Today is a boring boring boring day. Like seriously, my life is getting more mundane as the days pass.
Anyway, today's lessons were pretty short. Played mahjong as usual during stats and went for english. Did my OP today and well, I guess I laughed pretty much during the presentation. I realise I tend to laugh a lot when I am up there presenting. Espeically when the mood is rather informal.

Anyways, after lesson, went to do soci assignment with Kai Ling, Amy and Rui Ping. I think the brain storming part is pretty efficient as we all managed to have a rough idea of what we want to write for our articles.

And I think the senior who is going to sell me the book is DAMN NICE. I felt so sorry for troubling him because initially I told him I don't need the book urgently. After realising that I have an assignment to hand in, I had to like bug him to bring the book soon.
He also offered to pass me his assignment as reference since I told him I needed the book for an assignment. LIKE OMG. Damn nice! I didn't even request for it! He OFFERED!

I think Amy is like damn suay! She was like almost done with her soci essay when she closed the window without saving. IN the end, she has to redo the whole essay. Like super sian!!

Anyway, I'm in welfare cell for DE club and looking forward to all the activities! =D

School's gonna be really busy for me.
I just hope I will be able to cope!

*Katty
(( Busy ))

2009-09-08T20:20:00.003+08:00

[[ rotted ]]

I wasted one whole day at home today! Doing nothing except my english paragraph writing assignment. I think I am seriously putting in a lot of effort for english when it is just a pass or fail module. But seriously, I don't want to fail because I do not want to take english module for another semester!

Anyway, I think school is getting to be pretty sian. I don't really like school life. And I detest the fact that I am trying to be someone I am not. I have no idea why. I just wish I was that someone I were last year.

Why am I trying to change myself?
The more I think of it, the weirder I think I am.
Argh. It is a long story. Anyway, I've decided not to care. And I need to learn to overcome my greatest fear, which is to be alone.

I guess everyone can tell my life has become rather mundane seeing that I don't update my blog as often as I do previously.
Nothing much happens nowadays I guess.

Oh, I mugged with Shan yesterday! We spent like half the time talking and all those. We even chatted with each other online when we are like facing each other! Super funny!

Then the bus ride home was super classic. I realise how bad my chinese is! I can never formulate full sentences!
But I know what is Sylvester's chinese name now! Wahahahahahahaha...
LOL..
No idea why but it sounds like a girl's name.

And I know how to write Shan's chinese name now. =D

And I realise how weird Shan's name look when I type it out. SHANLY. So weird! Super not used to seeing this word since I always type Shan. LOL..

And I realise how am I trying to ignore all the complications in my life.

*Katty
(( busted ))

2009-09-08T00:42:00.003+08:00

[[ Bleh ]]

HAPPY BIRTHDAY
LIM TIAN YAN!

*Katty
(( bleh ))

2009-09-06T00:14:00.005+08:00

[[ Bleh ]]

Its been a long time since I've last blogged with pictures. Yes... I know. That's sad. But that is because there is something wrong with blogger.
And my internet connection has been really really slow!

Anyway, I realise certain things always happens to me. Like those embarrassing moments. I have no idea why but it always does. Perhaps it happens to everyone too. But I rather it didn't happen to me.

Like yesterday at taekwondo.
I was late because of certain reasons. When I reached the class, every single one was seated in the hall. And guess what everyone is doing?

Everyone is listening to the coach speak. And what was the coach saying? He was teaching everyone the importance of respect and how people should behave when they are late for class. He was in the middle of his speech, teaching them how they should first wait for attention at the side and then wait for the coach to acknowledge before bowing to him and the class. When I reached, I had no idea what was happening. Thank god I did the right thing! But it was like, after I did it, everyone cheered and clapped! Then everyone was looking at me! I was like so paiseh!

Then during training, I has to pair with this rather pro senior I think. So embarrassing! That's because I've never used hard target to practice before. Ok, maybe I did but that was eons ago.
I totally did not know how to hold the thing! It made things so difficult for the senior because he can't kick a target that wasn't held properly! Then like random people will ask what belt I am. I didn't even dare to tell them la! I feel so noob!

Then after that, we had target training as a group. The coach decided to choose 5 people to hold on to the target while the rest of the class kicks. I believe the general tradition is for the more senior people to hold it. Because the moment the coach chose me to hold( i have no idea why!), some one said something like "why didn't he choose the person beside you but chose you? So many people around never choose, he chose you.."
That's not the worse. There was this other target holder, because the coach asked us to pick the better quality targets to hold, he came over and took the one on my hand and threw his own one to a side. Then I was like shocked because I was supposed to hold one. So I went to the side and pick another one. When i came back with the target, he came to me and said "oh, you also holding ah. "
I was like errrrr ya..

Rah! Awkward moments!
I didn't feel offended or anything, but I felt very awkward and embarrassed!

And I didn't know how to do a jumping back thrust. I must totally start training.

Anyway, I realised as school starts, I will lost my aim. I wanted to achieve so much. I had so many plans. I realised, I've lost the motivation to do so. All I want to do now is to play well for my concert, practice taekwondo hard and get good grades.
Work, tuition, jap class. They aren't helping.

Jiayou bah!
*Katty
(( bleh ))

2009-08-30T19:05:00.002+08:00

[[ Rah ]]

I've just got cut off hours from work. Which means effectively, I've only worked for 10.5 hours this month. Which means I only have $73.5 this month! This is pretty shitty!

Thank god I have tuition and this increases my total salary by $150. What can I do with $223.5 when I have to much to pay for, people's birthdays coming up in September and everything.

I want to watch "UP" and "the proposal". Anyone wants to watch it with me?

I am most probably going to continue my Japanese lessons with my dearest piku. This means that on top of my 4 day week and having only tuesdays off on week days, my wednesday nights are occupied with band/taekwondo, thursdays with band, saturday afternoons with taekwondo, saturday nights with tuition and sunday afternoon with Jap lessons.

On top of that, I am actually taking 6 modules due to ES1101.

And yet, I am so much slacker than the people around me. I don't seem to be having much work to do and I am always sleeping in lectures, playing mahjong at home all the time.

Is there something wrong? I keep having this feeling that there is some lecture that I have to attend but I haven't been attending which is why I have so little amount of work to do.

Something is not quite right but I can't put my finger on it.

I feel like joining another CCA. As in those clubs and societies kind.
Still thinking about it. Shall see how things go.

Going for dinner already.

*Katty
(( Confused ))

2009-08-29T14:49:00.002+08:00

[[ a stupid girl ]]

I realise I am very very easily touched. Looking at someone living blissfully, looking at a old couple, holding hands and walking down the road is enough to make my eyes swell up with tears.

I think the happiest things on earth is to be able to live with the one you love till you are old.

You know you are truly blessed when although you are old, wrinkled and your joints aching, someone is willing to care for you, smile at the thoughts of your past with him.

How many people will be able to live together till they are old together? Someone who is willing to sacrifice his own enjoyment just so that you can live better?

I am still waiting for that person how will be willing to peel prawns for me. Heehee

*Katty
(( blessed? ))

2009-08-25T11:15:00.003+08:00

[[ What? ]]

Taekwondo tomorrow! Excited! =D

And suddenly, I don't have to guts to blog out my inner most thoughts.
This feeling in awful. I want to pour everything out but things are stopping me.

It's like trying to play on a swing. Trying very hard to swing high up, only to be stopped by the strong wind, not allowing you to move on.

OK, lousy analogy. I can't think of anything better. Seriously, the english lessons are draining me. I am like spending more time on the english lessons as compared to my core modules.

I don't feel as if I am in Uni actually. Everyone around me is like stressed up due to the work load but here I am playing mahjong all day along and everything. I haven't started any tutorial and I haven't been listening to any of the lectures.

This is bad, real bad.
And I still have no idea on whether to run for a committee position in band yet. I know its not like thr band needs me to run, considering the fact that I've just joined and everything. However, I do want to do something more in my year 1. I feel like giving a shot at being active in a committee in year 1 but I don't have to guts to do it.

I feel like a loser actually. I have no idea when it became that I don't have confidence in whatever I do anymore.

Should I run for it or shouldn't I?

*Katty
(( Hmmmm ))

2009-08-23T12:35:00.002+08:00

[[ bleh ]]

I really dislike being left out. The feeling of not being part of the group even though you started out being it really sucks.

I think I need to get used to it. And I really don't like walking around school alone. I think all of us are feeling that.

I feel so awkward everywhere. How I wish I am more adaptive to changes. Perhaps, then, at least I will not feel so awkward everywhere I go.

I have decided to join band, again. I really think it is an addiction because I just cannot stop myself from joining band each time.

Anyway, I am wondering if I should run for exco position. Partly because I want to try out something interesting in my first year, partly because I want to accumulate CCA points so that I can apply for hall next year. I really hate travelling so long everyday.

I might be joining taekwondo in school too. Especially after the first practice, I realise there are so many basics that I have forgotten. It is like as if, I have never learnt them before. I guess by going for the trainings, I will be able to build up a more stable foundation that I once had but lost it along the way.

Tuition and work is going to tire me a lot too I guess. And I am going to have to work very hard to maintain a good CAP score.

I wonder if I will be able to handle so many things at once. I hope I am able too. Wish me luck!

On a side note, went out with lamerstory gang yesterday! HAHA. I really miss hanging out with them. It is like, somehow, nothing beats all 5 of us meeting up and crapping. Although most of us aren't feeling the best of the best yesterday, I still did enjoy myself because I really miss the time we had together.

Lets hope that 10 years on we will still be as close as ever. =D

Miss ya all lots!

*Katty
(( as the stars fall.. ))

2009-08-19T17:18:00.002+08:00

[[ Me? ]]

School ended pretty early today. =D
English lessons are pretty much of a bore.

However, I do have to admit that my grammar is extremely weak. I guess no harm in attending the lessons.

And I slept through my stats lecture again! I really really did not do it on purpose. I tried! I really tried to keep awake!I tried my best to keep my eyes open! I listened to like near half of the lecture in the beginning, which was pretty much useless. Soon, I was so tired and bored, I went into DEEP sleep.

Went home to play Mahjong and lost every single cent I have, AGAIN.

And I suddenly.....

*Katty
(( Deep in thoughts.. ))

2009-08-18T15:47:00.000+08:00

[[ OOOH ]]

Using my lappy now!! I can finally see the blogger website in its proper alignment. Somehow, my computer at home has weird alignment. And the internet access at Macs here is actually better than the one at home. This shows how lousy my internet at home is!!

Went to work today. I handled the pos myself!! Happy! I finally know how to use the pos! I was the only one running body side today and I managed to not screw up, at least not too bad.

And I managed to close some deals that are above 50 plus! Happy!! Heehee!

I am supposed to be doing my work but I ended up playing mahjong because the smooth internet access is too tempting to resist!

English lessons are pretty much a bore. And I can spot grammar errors without knowing why it is wrong. I just know that it is wrong but the reason behind it like blah-blah agreement or prefect tense or whatever. I know the right form of word to use but I have no idea why that form must be used.

I think it is time I do my work now.
I want to resume working. I think working is so much more fun than studying. But I know I have to study because I can't be working as a part-timer my whole life.

But I really enjoy working much more than studying. And I realise I do find satisfaction in providing good service, that is when the customer deserves it.

I played bball for like 5 hours yesterday! Super fun! And I managed to shoot in a 3 pointer! Heehee! And one of syl's friend, Ryan or something taught me how to shoot a 3 pointer since i always don't have enough energy to reach the hoop.

I miss bball! I wanna bball some more!!

GTG do some work already.
Till then...

Katty
(( ^^))

2009-08-16T12:15:00.000+08:00

[[ 1st week of school ]]

I haven't really gotten used to the uni system yet. Especially the part about everyone or at least majority of the people around me having unique timetables of their own.

School is pretty much boring considering the fact that we are all doing introduction to the modules.

Went for the band welcome tea. Actually, I guess I've pretty much decided that I want to join band because I really miss playing my instrument and also playing in a band.

Band is pretty much like an addiction you know. Every single time I leave band/step down from band, I will vow not to join band again. After a while, I will start missing playing in a band. Sooner or later, I will end up joining the band again.

I'm not a good player but i relish the times the section come together to perfect a piece that might not exactly be within our abilities initially.

OH well.. I think I am a sucker for band la... And that sucks because I cannot play well and it sucks to know that you are the one pulling the section down. I must work harder!! That helps with a horn at home! =D

Anyway, I think I am already lagging behind in lessons. I am like not even starting to get on my readings. OH wells....

And I am playing bball again! Playing bball makes me miss Cindy because we used to be the few girls in the class who will opt to play bball when the others will either stone or go for break.

I miss Cindy. Wonder how she is now. =(

*Katty
(( Ah well ))

2009-08-08T22:57:00.002+08:00

[[ blog with pictures ]]

I really really wanted to blog with pictures today but sadly, since my desktop is not working and I am using my laptop which has no programmes installed, no pictures for today..

Rag is finally over. After like near 1 month of practice, our hardwork finally paid off! We've got the best rag award!

I kinda learn quite a lot of things through rag. University is indeed a place different from any other insitiutions I've pursued my education in.
In this 1 month or so, rag really opened my eyes to a lot of things.

I realise how independent the student body is as compared to before in the govt schools.
Everything is like planned by the student body and commitment is really based on interest and self-discipline and not enforcement by the admin office or something.

I also learned that a cave should never contain 2 tigers. It is good to have people who are good in a particular area to work together but a pack should never proceed without a leader. And the leader must be someone who is able to be firm and also ensure that he/she understands his/her role in the pack. Just like how a leader should know how to lead, his followers should also know how to follow.

Anyway, enough of the reflections already. All in all, I am really glad I joined rag. Even though rag was a huge source of pressure, I truly enjoyed the experience. I guess that is because I really love dance and rag really gave me an avenue to learn more about dance. I may not dance well and I may not be the best dancer but at least I tried my best!

I've also seen some people work really really hard. Especially Sze Ying. She really worked super hard for the dance and her cheerleading. I am really impressed by her attitude and I guess in a way, it was a source of motivation for me to work hard too. I was like thinking.. Even Sze Ying who has cheerleading which makes her really tired and all bruised out can put in so much effort in practicing the steps, why can't I, a normal dancer just doing steps not be able to do it?

I've learnt a lot through Rag and the things I've learnt are really things I've never thought about before.

I was really happy that we won the best Rag award. But this happiness is very different from that I experienced in band when we won the GWH in RV.

I think I know what the reason is. And this made me treasure my love for band in general more.

*Katty
((Pictures? ))

2009-08-05T23:38:00.000+08:00

[[ Bleh ]]

Rag has been taking up so much of my time! I go home at like 10 plus 11!!
My parents aren't too happy about that too.

And I realise how sickening it is to not be able to get the modules you want. =(
I have been outbidded for all my choices!

-------------------------------------------------
Modules Not Successfully Allocated
-------------------------------------------------

Module Code: GEK1046
Module Title: Introduction to Cultural Studies
Reason: Outbidded
Bid ID: B00003076222
Your Bid: 100
Winning Bid: 100

Module Code: GEK1508
Module Title: Einstein's Universe & Quantum Weirdness
Reason: Outbidded
Bid ID: B00003071913
Your Bid: 50
Winning Bid: 51

HOW SUAY CAN I GET!! Rahhhhhhh!!!!!!!! Super bu shuang can!

I have to like bid for the modules again tomorrow.
I am super luan about my modules now! And it is sickening that I don't know when my english lessons will be held! Especially since there seems to be lectures for it but no one seems to know about it. Rah...
*Katty
(( Pek Cek ))

2009-07-29T23:14:00.001+08:00

[[ Blessed :) ]]

I haven't felt the urge to blog for such a long time I've sort of forgotten what it feels like.
And I realise I am quite blessed.

I may not have made many friends in SDE. I may not have found like the best person to click with, considering the fact that we haven't known each other for a long time, a chat with Simin made me realise how many real friends that matter I have.

This may not make much sense to you but it really does to me.
I was quite worried previously because I think I will pretty much be a loner in uni considering the fact that with my QET and random timetable, I won't have company all the time. In addition, I don't have someone that I am super super close with in PFM. I won't deny that I might find someone I can click with super well in future, but as of now, there isn't. I do have friends but its kinda pre-mature to pass the verdict about whether we can click. But they are really nice so there is a chance! =D

But now, I realise it doesn't really matter. I have friends who really care and friends who will always be there. People whom I can really mix around with. They may not be the most widely accepted bunch out there, I mean, come on, we've all got to agree at some point of time that we are weird in one way or another. But I know that they are the ones who really matter.

We may not be always around one another but we all know that when we have time, things don't change. We will still be a close as we were.

Just like what Ying2 said yesterday. People out there in the real world, not many are as crazy and happy-go-lucky as us. I realised this not too long ago when I realised sometimes, I am really the only person getting super high. I guess that's cause I'm used to it. Being the house affiliate, and OGL, when I bond with new people, I tend to be the high one to encourage people to get high. Yingrui, Simin and Cindy does crazy things with me too!
Lamergang is worse. We get high all the time especially with Chrisliew and the mid-night Ying2. And I realise I can really be high 24/7. I think I need to learn to cool down.

And I think I need to start to spend more time with my friends, especially those that really matter.
I think I am really blessed to have friends like the SZB and Lamergang. Even the Temps too.

I'm really glad for my friends. =D

*Katty
(( Blessed. :) ))

2009-07-25T23:28:00.000+08:00

[[ Eight hundred ]]

Like wow! THis is my 800th post already.
*sometimes love, comes around*
The song is like repeating again and again in my head!!

But I've to admit the song is pretty nice. =D

Anyway, sent my cousins off to Japan yesterday. Amazingly I didn't cry. I was trying to keep the tears in. I kind of felt bad because I did not get to spend a lot of them with them with all the rag practices and work taking up practically every second of my life.

Rag practice was crazy yesterday! The toxic dancers were so high! Ok, minus all the people who went away.
And I realised everyone is kinda like a nice bunch of people. We should hang out more often! Albeit I was called the girl with the loose screw.

I really enjoyed rag practice yesterday! I think it is my favourite practice so far!

Oh! And I matriculated yesterday!
I am so relieved! I have always been worried that I am actually not a student of NUS because of all the clicks here and there during the Joint Admission Exercise.

Anyway, I've received my NUS card! Its ORANGE! Omg! I love NUS so much! Everything is ORANGE!
Oh oh! And I bought a NUSSU shirt! Pretty colour combination! I shall buy more!

I want to sign up for the Standard Chartered Debit Card too! The DBS one too!!
I want to join so many CCAS!

I think there is a high chance that I will end up joining band and playing the French Horn again. The more I think about it, the more I realise I miss playing french horn!
But I want to learn how to play the drum set! What is the perfect way of fulfilling both wants?

I hope I can get into Dance Blast. Then again, I think I shouldn't put in too much hope in it because I suck at dance. But I really like dance! Perhaps I will join the hip hop course they provide in NUS! Then again, I am super broke! Shall see how then.

I am going to buy a laptop soon! Super excited! First time in my whole life! Happy! =D

Today's pretty boring but at least I managed to sort of confirm which GEM I want to take! =D
And Ayuni put on a very very very think layer of make up on me today!

*Katty
(( ))

2009-07-23T23:32:00.001+08:00

[[ blogging ]]

There is something seriously wrong with my computer! My layout for blogger is completely screwed!

Nothing much has been happening but I am definitely super busy!

Watched harry potter 2 times!

And I really miss the days back with SZB and the lamerstory gang.

I miss Ying2, Chrisliew and surprisingly, Eugene and Zeyi too!

I want to go random chit chat sessions with Simin and Yingrui!

And there are some things on my mind now.. Boohoohoo..

I wanna go back to work. As in. I wanna work and random chit chat and hang around with the cotton on peeps! I think life is less stressful at work. At least I think it is easier to interact with the people there...

School's starting. That sucks. =(

*Katty
((JIAYOU ))

2009-07-20T22:08:00.002+08:00

[[ Sian ]]

I have no idea what happened to my passion to blog. Perhaps after more than 6 years, this passion is finally dying. I have no idea if this is a good or bad thing.
It would be good in the sense that random strangers will now not know about my life. The sad thing being that blogging is really the only place I am truthful to myself, a place I am truly myself.
Maybe I am just lazy to blog. Perhaps the passion will reignite itself when I start school!

Oh oh! I am so gonna buy a laptop soon! Happy! =D

And I suck at dance! I seriously think I will pull the whole group down. I seriously cannot dance! Which makes me kinda sad because I really like dancing. I thought rag is a place where people learn dance together. Like for the laszlo walk in performance. But all the people around are so pro! They all can dance damn well. Makes me kinda stress. Ok, not kinda stressed. It makes me very stressed! I don't want to pull down the whole team. I feel like backing out but I think it will make matters worse because all the formation and foot work will now have to change. Super at a dilemma! I try practicing at home but I still look stupid when I dance!
Haies.
I think you are too good to be true. Someone too far out of my reach.

*Katty
(( Bleh ))

2009-07-20T00:51:00.002+08:00

[[ The world keeps spinning round and round ]]

Nothing much happened recently except Rag, Rag and more Rag. Finished learning the dance but I think there is a lot to clean up.

Work is as crazy. Went for a chilling session with Irene, Kai Shi, Sid and Guo Wei after closing on friday. Resulted in me not being able to wake up on time for the Sentosa outing!

Lots of pictures on the outing but I am super lazy to upload them. All found on facebook. Go figure.

Qet is over and I totally screwed up the paper. Total lack of planning, atrocious grammar, god-forsaken content. I am so going to take english modules. =(
I really don't want to take english in UNI! Freaking boring and waste of time!

Work tomorrow, going for medical check up soon too. Lots of things to do to register for UNI and I am so blur about everything.

Cousinz going off soon. I didn't get to spend much time with them! I hope I can visit them in Taiwan after they go over. =)

Uni is starting and suddenly, all my enthusiasm vanished into thin air.
What do I want in life exactly?

*Katty
(( Stone ))

2009-07-15T01:35:00.000+08:00

[[ Damn long ]]

Its's been damn long since I last blogged! Yeah man!
Lots of things happened!

I'm attached now! HAHA. Attached to my darling SIMIN! LOL!!! Damn gao xiao sia!
BUT ITS NOT REAL LA. =.-

Anyways, came back from UNION camp! Went for rag practices, practiced rag more, went to work, went clubbing for the first time.

Lots of things to blog about but I am too lazy to do so!
And my computer is seriously going to crash soon. =(
The internet is like breaking up all the time! I am quite pissed of by that.

***Warning, angry entry ahead***

Anyway, someone told me something today. I went to check it out. I feel like screaming FUCK YOU at the person sia! Try being a customer service personnel for one day. Since you are so holy and high up there, I don't think you can even serve a customer properly can! I think you will scream at the very first person you serve la please!
And secondly, if your action is right, I don't know what is wrong already man! What you did was WRONG. It was CUTTING QUEUE. Please la. FUCK you sia! If you can ask your friend to queue for you while you shop, and you just cut in, when you and your friend is making 2 separate payments, and you call that NOT cutting queue, I have no idea what is man! Just imagine, one person queue, the whole class just chap in like this. According to you, it is not cutting queue right? See how you feel next time someone does that to you. And if you never did all these, you wouldn't have INVITED those comments to yourself.
People rant off rubbish when they are pissed, you can't blame them for it when you are at fault in the FIRST PLACE FUCKER.

And oh please, if you have some inferiority complex, please, see a psychologist and not make a mountain out of a molehill.

I totally understand what it feel like. Customers nowadays are like SHIT. Seriously. They think they are like always right. That is the service attitude, not the customer attitude. Customers are NOT always right, we just make it seem like you are right so as to provide good service. Some people just don't get it.

OH ya, and big deal about you holding some high ranking post in some MNC.

================================================================

I had a very VERY VERY interesting customer today. FREAKED OUT SIA! LOL

*Katty
(( Rah ))

2009-07-10T21:46:00.002+08:00

[[ CLUBBED ]]

ZOUK!

AK47, Apricot Brandy 7-up, Apple Shooter, Black Russian, Bloody Mary, Blowjob, B52, Graveyard, Gin Tonic, Illusion, Lamborgini, Long Island Tea, Lychee Martini, Midori Sprite, Pineapple Rum, Rum coke, Tequila Pop, Tequila Neat/Shot, Tequila Lime, Vodka Redbull, Vodka Ribena, Vodka Orange, Vodka Cranberry, Vodka 7-up, Vodka Lime, Whisky Green Tea, Whisky Coke, Whisky Sprite, Watermelon Martini, Lychee Martini

*Katty
(( =D ))

2009-07-04T01:24:00.003+08:00

[[ Long long ago ]]

Long long ago, in a faraway land, there was an average girl living alone with her parents in a little hut they call home.
She was no where near being rich but neither was she poor.

She knew her parents have a hard time earning their keeps so she tries to survive on whatever she has.
She tries to understand her parents as much as she can. She does so many things because of her consideration for her parents.

She love her parents so. Her choices may not necessarily be her favourite but she knows that those choices are the ones that will benefit, or at least be of a lesser burden to her parents.

Yet, her parents don't understand her. They always think that they have already taken a huge step back, and giving in a lot to her. She wants to learn to be independent, to get a little more freedom. Yet, they believe they are already very lenient. They like to compare with those whose parents are even more strict. But why can't they see that those are really the minority? And now she belongs to the minority.

She tried to communicate with them but all ended up with no avail. In fact, they all come to the same conclusion. COLD WAR.

It sucks. No wonder she has got such short temper in her younger days and keeps getting into cold war with her friends. It is in the genes.

*******************LALALA***********************

Went barracks with APOLLO! Photos!

Clara! Damn long never see her sia!

Candid!

This thing is super cute!!!

Super nick pizza!! LOVE IT TO BITS!

My main course!! Super yummy!!! Lobster linguine!

Jaden's dish!

Jacob's dish that I think look like wanton noodles. HAHA.. But I am sure it tastes a lot better. That's a lot coming from a wanton noodles lover k!

I was the last to finish!!! But it is super nice!! Finished up everything!

Me and shiying! ^^

Clara and I!

Me and pristine!

Both "Shi ying"s have so cute dimples! I want them!!! Maybe I should change my name to shi ying so that I will have dimples too!!

Wei Yolk! Love her dress!

Yingmin looks super sweet!!!

Sylvester. Suddenly take photo with someone who is 1 head taller, camera angle also screwed up. LOL

Yuchang and I!!

Me and Marilyn! She look super super cute la!! OMG..

And at barracks, there were a few chio bus!! OMG. EYE CANDY! HAHA.. I seriously sound like a lesbian. LOL. BUt chio bus nice to admire ma! HEEHEE.

*Katty
(( ah wells. ))

2009-07-03T01:10:00.002+08:00

[[ Heehee ]]

I met Sab and Simin today!! But today is a busy day! So I didn't have a chance to like greet them properly. So many things to do today!

I want to go on crazy shopping but my salary is not here yet!
Not that it is a lot la huh...

I am super super tired! I finally get to rest!! YAY!!!
No work tomorrow!! =D

*Katty
((XOXO ))

2009-07-02T02:43:00.002+08:00

[[ Like crazily ]]

One week I don't work at all, and the next, I am working like crazy!
I clocked 15 hours (excluding 2 hours of break) in just one day! Crazy or not?!
And I clocked 10 hours today excluding 1 hour of dinner.

But I spent so much I don't think the money I've earned is enough to cover back.
I've spent like 60 plus 70 in cotton on already! I want to maximise my use of staff privileges! Contract ending on monday!

I am super super tired now! Only 2 people in body today for closing. Racked up till I wanna puke. Did VM yesterday. Like omg. Tiring! Did VM until like 1.30 am!

And I have work tomorrow. Closing! At least I get to rest on friday..

Saturday last day of work! I am having lesser hopes in renewing my contract because no one has mentioned anything. Oh well. Its ok!! =D Can always find another job! HAHA. But perhaps not one that pays as much. =(

And I have to get used to working in a new environment again....
Its ok! Katty! You rock! ^^

And SAB IS BACK FROM CAMP! LOL..
*Katty
((Lubbs ))

2009-06-29T23:46:00.002+08:00

[[ 5/6 ]]

This is my 6th day in quarantine. 1 day in PGP 5 days at home. Seriously, I think this is the longest period I've stayed home for years. Is like normally, you go school. During the holidays, I have band and all those weird activities.

Its has been a long long long long time that I've last stayed at home without stepping out of the house for more than 2 days. And yet, this time, I've stayed at home 5 days consecutively!

I am super excited about going school! I so want to join all those adhoc activities and everything. I missed out my chance in NJ because I appealed in and cannot even attempt to join student council! This time, even if I don't make it into student union, I can always join other activities! Woots! I love adhoc activites. Don't ask me why. I don't really know myself either. Perhaps it is because I get to work as a team with people and we make miracles happen together? The SMU interviewer mentioned that I seemed to like teamwork a lot. I guess if she never mentioned it, I would never have realised. Not bad for a organisational behavior lecturer! HAHA.

And I really like planning and all those!! So excited!! And I most probably going to join dance with SAB!! Love love! Oh man! I miss Sab and Jas and gang so much! Ahhhhhh...

I still pondering if I should join band and taekwondo. I love these two so much but the external factors are like pulling me away. Long stories.

And I thinking of joining tennis or squash. I know it sounds weird coming from me but I really want to try something new in UNI. I don't want to stick to what I feel comfortable with again. This is my last shot at school life and I will live my UNI life to the fullest!

I feel like joining one CCA with every closer friend I have in NUS so that not only we can keep in contact, I can get myself exposed to more things!

I do know that the competitive sports are not easy to get in but I can always join the recreational ones! I hope they have cheap water sports. HAHA. Note, the important word being cheap! And water sports meaning wakeboarding, water skiing and all those. Not swimming and what's not.

OMT! The more I blog about this, the more high I get! I want to join orientation next year too! Being an OGL is tonnes of fun!

But I didn't get my hostel. =( Haha. OK, I know I am harping on it but most people around me should know one of the major points that made me choose NUS is because of the hostel. Staying in hostel would have made everything so much more fun!! HMPH. Never mind. NEXT year!! I'll be back! (or hopefully the waiting list thing works for me and I get a spot. =D )

OMG. I am like getting super high for no reason. SUPER DUPER HIGH! I can't wait to go NUS!!!

I suddenly realise if I take up a CCA with every close friend, I will have like 7 or 8 CCA!!! LIKE OMG.

But super high!! I can go school/go home with either Zhi Ying or SAB!!! I miss my Sab!
She at camp now. =(

OH well. UNI going to start soon! I can't wait! ^^

But before that, OG outing at dempsey on friday!!! And I might be going clubbing!! FOR THE FIRST TIME!! Like OMG! WOOOO!!

*Katty
(( YEAH! ))

2009-06-29T00:35:00.001+08:00

[[ OPs! ]]

Hostel application rejected!
I expected it because I didn't really fill in the achievements part properly because I thought everything is by balloting.

But i really want to stay hostel! That is one major point why I chose NUS and not SMU. Because it is dumb to stay in SMU's hostel. HAHA.
But its ok! I am going to try for the waiting list thing. If I don't get it, there is always next year!

Jiayou!! XOXO

*Katty
(( Hugs and kisses ))

2009-06-27T20:04:00.002+08:00

[[ great ]]

1 more to the list. Now there is 2 in my OG that has tested positive.
Oh well. All I can say is, my parents are taking a lot of precaution in the sense that they feed me with things like herbal tea and soursop and green bean soup and all those.

I hope nothing goes wrong so that we can all go out on friday for our POST-Quarantine!! Yeah!
It is pretty cool if you think about it. Have you actually have people who can drive u around. Like wow. Secondary school seemed so long ago.

I will post about my 2 days of camp real soon. On a side note, all the pictures are already on facebook and I no point in blogging here anyway.

Children of Apollo UNITE!

*Katty
(( APOLLO! ))

2009-06-27T13:15:00.002+08:00

[[ Short ]]

Yeah.. My posts nowadays are really short. I guess when I have a lot in my mind, I tend to lost the ability to blog. Oh well. I sort of cleared my mind about certain things now. I realised that there isn't a point in trying to force things, to force 2 people who aren't of the same frequency to become close. But that doesn't mean that we can't be friends. Just that perhaps, I need to learn to let go. =D

I am now officially STUCK at home for 7 days until friday because someone in my group has tested positive for H1N1. Yeah, I pretty much feel like cursing the person who brought the flu into the camp. And it wasn't like he was feeling totally well before the camp anyway. He had sore throat. Like totally, thanks man.

Yeah, I feel grumpy about it. I am sore that I am not able to complete the camp. I think the organizers feel worst. After all those preparation, they didn't not manage to complete it and they have to do more "sai gang"
to clear all the admin things now.

Sometimes in life, SHIT happens.

*Katty
(( Rah ))

2009-06-27T00:27:00.001+08:00

[[ Oh well ]]

I am never one to sustain a friendship.

*Katty
(( speechless ))

2009-06-26T21:04:00.001+08:00

[[ damn ]]

My schedule is all screwed up. I am now just waiting for the final confirmation call. Damn it damn it damn it!
Argh.
PLEASE. LET the numbers stop!

*Katty
(( Pissed ))

2009-06-26T12:25:00.002+08:00

[[ Sianx]]

Freaking bored at home. Still waiting.

Hope you are alright dear! Then we can go out some more and continue our talk-till-4am thing!

My temperature is decreasing. WHAHAHAA

*Katty
(( Sleepy ))

2009-06-25T13:35:00.003+08:00

[[ break camp ]]

Broke camp early.
Too many things happened.
Don't wanna talk about it now. Don't wanna jinx anything.
I am sincerely hoping that nothing is wrong.

Please let everything be fine.

Bless you.

*Katty
(( praying hard ))

2009-06-21T21:37:00.001+08:00

[[ Changed ]]

Changed my blog address! Boomerang. There is actually a meaning behind it. Hehheh. Shall keep it to myself. =D

Decided to change my blog address because well, ikanbili was something linked to my life in NJ. I have already moved on from then and so should my blog address! Anyway, it sounds dumb whenever people ask me why I choose that as my blog address anyway.

*Katty
(( Luves ))

2009-06-21T00:56:00.002+08:00

[[ Heehee ]]

Nothing much happened today bah. I think I need to start loving blogging as much as I did before.

Anyway, watched drag me to hell with Nic and some other colleagues. I think I practically closed my eyes 90% of the time!!! But some parts are really funny. HAHA..

Anyway, I finally got back my phone! After 3 freaking weeks! I was so planning on going there to scold some people already. Luckily that afternoon someone sms-ed me to inform me that my phone is ready. I feel so paiseh using Yingzi's phone for so long can! Plus Ong block leave... then like Yingzi use his phone I wonder what phone he use la...

Anyway.. NO work tomorrow!! Super happy!

And I am addicted to Jai ho.

~You are the reason that I breathe
you are the reason that I still believe

lalalalala!! Love!!!

Oh!! And dearest Simin is going ID!!! SDE FTW!!! Hehheh!!!

And she asked me if I will regret something. Actually, I don't think I will. Because I am quite pissed with the way that place does things and I don't think I will lose out anything where I am now anyway. I will work harder to achieve my aims!! Jiayou kaixin!!

*Katty
(( YEAH~))

2009-06-18T00:25:00.002+08:00

[[ Hohoho... ]]

I haven been blogging as much as I did before! What happened to the urge to blog every single day! I guess it is because life is not as exciting anymore. Actually it is. It is just that I lost the motivation to blog!

Anyways, on monday, I went on a lamerstory outing! Went bowling and pool!!! EUGENE's bdae thingy!!! JIEMEI!! U are turning 19!!! OLd liao worh...

Today went out with Xuan!!! The buffet damn nice!!! OMG.. Shall kop pictures from her soon.
I wanna shop shop shop!! I just bought like 4 to 5 more tops!! And 2 more pairs of shoes!!! YAY!! I want more! I love love shopping!

Going out with Xuan and cousins tml!! Bringing them around. I feel like buying more tops!! Working at Cotton On sure has its benefits!! Hehheh!!
After that meeting Nic and some other people to watch drag me to hell. I am so scared sia! I am so not a horror movie person!! =X
Watching drag me to hell = dragging me to hell. LOL!!!

Just joking. I hope I survive though. The last "horror" movie I watched was The Eye which wasn't even scary....

*Katty
(( BLEH ))

2009-06-15T23:16:00.002+08:00

[[ LALALA ]]

Sometimes, as we walk on, we realise some relationships aren't the they you think it is.
Friends. What are they?

Is it really so difficult to find someone, just one, one close friend. Someone who will always be there just that how I will always be there for her.

Sometimes, you two just pisses me off so bad I feel like scolding fuck into your faces.
Sorry if I sound harsh but I am truly pissed.

*Katty
(( LALA ))

2009-06-12T01:02:00.002+08:00

[[ Chore or not? ]]

I know I haven been too regular about my updates. Which is bad!
And quite a lot of things happened!

I've starting work. Super interesting way of interview. Is super high and all those!! Although I think I was the only one high there...
I went cycling with Yingrui at east coast! Exotic right! Ate satay and sambal stingray!
Legs were super suan that night till I can't sleep.
Yet, the next day, I woke up perfectly fine! (perfectly fine reminds me to Damian Chee. =.=)
Worked till like 12 mid night!!

Then played lots of drums! I think I am wasting a lot of money on drums! =.=
I should stop playing that!

And my salary is not paid YET! I am going to make a fuss soon. Once I get the time to do it.
This tells me to NEVER trust agencies! Always find jobs yourself because things get messy when there is a third party involved.

Anyway, lots of things to blog but I have no mood for it! I want my phone so that I can take pictures!!
I want digital cam!!!

I want to go uni! Omg. SUPER EXCITED.

*Katty
(( HIGH! ))

2009-06-09T21:59:00.003+08:00

[[ Flash Mob]]

Went to flip through some nuffnang website. OMG. They are going to have some PJ thing! I so wanna join! Stupid work on that day.

ARGH. I want to go for the PJ thing! I think it will be so much fun!!!
I think my schedule is quite screwed. I haven done anything for NUS application other than the form P. Can someone tell me what should I do?

Anyway, I've started work for a few days already.
I miss the temp staff. =(

Jas, Sab, Piku, LG, Weijie, Ziyan and Vonny!
=(

*Katty
(( LALALA ))